Wedding Reflection – MaryKate and Pete

Gratitude  //  22nd February 2016

MaryKate and Pete were married on October 24, 2015 at Saints Peter and Paul Polish National Catholic Church, where MaryKate’s grandparents were married 67 years ago!  How special is that? 

1. When reflecting on your wedding, what is it that you remember most?

We both still vividly remember most how STRESSED OUT I (MaryKate) was months before the wedding trying to plan everything perfectly. But similarly, we also both remember the total calm that took over both of us on our ACTUAL wedding day where it suddenly didn’t matter anymore that not everything was perfect, because we were just so happy to be getting married!

2. If you could plan your wedding again, would you do anything differently?

I think we would have probably hired a wedding planner. I (MaryKate, again!!!) really did go a little bit overboard stressing over stuff that was pretty trivial all in the hope of having a “PERFECT” wedding day. I’ve since learned that there’s no such thing as a “perfect” wedding (unless you have millions and millions of dollars to spend, maybe!!), and that stress only hurt me (and probably Pete for having to deal with me!) and didn’t give me the chance to enjoy my engagement. A wedding planner would have taken care of a lot of those stresses for me, allowing me the chance to really enjoy that special time in our lives.

3. What, if anything, did you do before your wedding that helped prepare you most for life after saying “I Do”?

Moving in together and living together for over 2 years before getting married definitely prepared us most for life after marriage. It gave us time to learn all the little things about each other (some good some bad!) that may have come as a surprise had we not done that. We also took a course on financial planning and got our finances in order, in addition to discussing how we planned on spending/saving after we got married. In general, we had a lot of open conversations about what kind of lives we wanted to have including where we wanted to live, how many children we would hope to have, the things we were hoping to accomplish career-wise…basically just plan out to the best of our ability what the next few years after marriage would look like.

4. What is it that you LOVE most about being married that all of those engaged couples can look forward to?

Some people say that things drastically change after you get married, but we haven’t found things to be all that different day-to-day anyway. However, it’s been really nice to refer to each other as husband and wife and know that we have someone there to support us no matter may come. It also feels like we’re entering into a “next stage” in our lives, and that feels really special (and adult!).

5. What advice would you give to an engaged couple who is currently planning their own wedding?

RELAX!!!!!!! Haha! Seriously, it’s all going to work out–even if your wedding looks NOTHING like you ever pictured it would, it’s not going to matter because you’re going to be thrilled anyway. And then you and your spouse can laugh about it afterwards like we do now!! 

Also, unless you are the next Martha Stewart–STAY OFF PINTEREST, or at least try to as much as possible. No real wedding will ever look like those weddings and trying to replicate them may send you over the edge, like it nearly did for me! It’s not worth it to go crazy over budget, it’s not worth it to be constantly stressed out about picking all the “right” thing, it’s going to be a lovely wedding because you two and the people who love you are there and at the end of the day that’s all that matters!

6. Is there anything else that you would like to share with other engaged/newly married couples?

Try to take things one day at a time and be happy with whatever stage of life you’re in. Being engaged and being married are some of the most beautiful and exciting times of your lives–try to stay present and enjoy every moment of it!

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We are so excited to start this year off with a Wedding Reflections Series on our blog from our 2015 Liz and Ryan couples! We understand that wedding planning can be hard and overwhelming… but we hope you never forget that all that really matters is that you are getting MARRIED! ;) That is so exciting! When wedding planning becomes stressful, please know that you are not alone and there are a lot of people out there (including us and our 2015 couples ;) ) who are cheering you on and want your marriage to start off on the right track! Please let us know how we can help make the start of your marriage AMAZING! ;)

Wedding Reflection – Renee and Joost

Gratitude  //  15th February 2016

Renee and Joost were married at St. Mary’s Catholic Church in Rochester, NY with a reception at the Strathallan Hotel. Below are a few of their reflections from the beginning of their married lives together!

1. When reflecting on your wedding, what is it that you remember most?

Joost: There are so many things that I remember “the most.” The first look of Renee in the dress was a really special moment. For both us, right after the ceremony, when we were walking away by ourselves, realizing that we just got married!

Renee: I really remember the ceremony the most. There is a definite moment when you are pronounced by the priest as married and kiss and that is really the moment when it’s official. 

2. If you could plan your wedding again, would you do anything differently?

We had some confusion with the timing for the dinners and the venue thought we wanted a break between courses. Perhaps it would have been better to get a more detailed schedule from the chef/kitchen. Also, we hired a band and essentially just told them to play their standard wedding songs. But in hindsight, maybe giving them a few more preferences would have made it slightly better. But these are really minor, overall everything went really smoothly! 

3. What, if anything, did you do before your wedding that helped prepare you most for life after saying “I Do”?

Because we were married in the Catholic church, we took part in marriage preparation, which included having some discussions with other married couples. This was really helpful to talk through some of the topics that are easy to skip over when busy with wedding planning, such as: how to handle finances, or how each person in the relationship prefers to communicate. We didn’t necessarily figure everything out, but it at least started some open discussions. 

4. What is it that you LOVE most about being married that all of those engaged couples can look forward to?

On one hand, nothing really changes. But on the other hand, there is a new amount of “permanent” feeling that we will always be together, and that is very comforting. Being married adds a new meaning or layer to the relationship- like the relationship is stronger than before. We also really like just doing “normal.” After the stress of planning a wedding, it’s nice to get into a normal routine again. A couple weeks after our wedding, we went jogging on a Saturday morning, then had breakfast at home and just relaxed- no appointments, emails, or anything to immediately take care.   

5. What advice would you give to an engaged couple who is currently planning their own wedding?

Don’t get too stressed about the wedding. Think about the details ahead of time as much as you would like, but on the actual day – you just have to go with the flow. Everything will work out. I was not the most organized bride, but there are enough professionals around you that everything will go smoothly! One thing that we perhaps underestimated is how excited/enthusiastic/emotional our family members would be leading up to the wedding and on the day of the wedding. It’s so great to have everyone there, but they may have their own expectations of the day, which can require some managing or patience.  

Definitely plan a honeymoon, it was so relaxing, and something nice to look forward to after the wedding. 

6. Is there anything else that you would like to share with other engaged/newly married couples?

Enjoy being engaged – it’s (usually) a short amount of time and (hopefully) the only time you’ll ever be engaged! Also, for newly engaged couples – we planned our wedding in about 8 months. Lots of people and wedding magazines will suggest that you are crazy, but it is possible! We decided to have a wedding on Friday, and then essentially all vendors and the venue were available. Engagements don’t need to be super long if you don’t want that! 

For newly married couples – I feel that we are so newly married ourselves that we don’t have that much advice yet to give, so I’ll pass along some advice from my father. When I asked him for some advice on how he and my mother manage household finances, he said, “have a discussion, make a decision for the current time, but just don’t fight about it.” I hope to keep this in mind. There is probably very little worth fighting about!  

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We are so excited to start this year off with a Wedding Reflections Series on our blog from our 2015 Liz and Ryan couples! We understand that wedding planning can be hard and overwhelming… but we hope you never forget that all that really matters is that you are getting MARRIED! ;) That is so exciting! When wedding planning becomes stressful, please know that you are not alone and there are a lot of people out there (including us and our 2015 couples ;) ) who are cheering you on and want your marriage to start off on the right track! Please let us know how we can help make the start of your marriage AMAZING! ;)

Wedding Reflection – Amanda and Jeff

Gratitude  //  8th February 2016

Amanda and Jeff were married on July 18, 2015 at St. John the Baptist Church in Westport, MA with a beautiful reception at Carolyn Sakonnet Vineyards in Little Compton, Rhode Island. Here are a few of their reflections from the beginning of their lives together!

1. When reflecting on your wedding, what is it that you remember most?

That’s a tough one because it was such a magical day and one that went by too quickly if you ask us! We would have to say that it was the people – the sentiments of love and support we experienced during our wedding day was overwhelming and everyone was there to celebrate the love we share for one another. It’s an AMAZING feeling!

2. If you could plan your wedding again, would you do anything differently?

We wouldn’t change anything about our wedding day; however, we sometimes stressed about the little details. I would remember not to sweat the small stuff. No one notices it anyway!

3. What, if anything, did you do before your wedding that helped prepare you most for life after saying “I Do”?

We talked about everything we wanted for our lives – our goals, dreams, children, how to raise them, gender expression of our future children, etc. Although we do not have children yet, it’s good to know that all the major parts of our lives are similar and we have the same expectations for our married life together. We would also say that speaking with loved ones helped us to understand that no two marriages are the same and that it needs to be unique to us.

4. What is it that you LOVE most about being married that all of those engaged couples can look forward to?

EVERYTHING! Okay, maybe not everything but we like that we have a partner in each life obstacle or celebration. It’s great to know that if you are having a bad day at work that you can come home to someone who loves you and understands that maybe they will have to cook dinner to lessen the stress of the day. You are a team going through life together instead of feeling the pressures on your own.

5. What advice would you give to an engaged couple who is currently planning their own wedding?

First, it’s your wedding so the only opinions that truly matter is between you both. Yes, family is important and love ones might want to help but you do not NEED to do anything you both don’t love or want to do. Second, don’t sweat the small stuff. If you can’t get something to be exactly like you want it, it’s okay. People will remember the food, the music, and the love you both have for one another.

6. Is there anything else that you would like to share with other engaged/newly married couples?

When you’re married your love for each other will continue to grow so don’t forget to take time to bask in each other. Go on a date night, work out together, just do something at least once a week that is exclusively for you both. And remember to appreciate each other because love is the most beautiful thing in life!!

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We are so excited to start this year off with a Wedding Reflections Series on our blog from our 2015 Liz and Ryan couples! We understand that wedding planning can be hard and overwhelming… but we hope you never forget that all that really matters is that you are getting MARRIED! ;) That is so exciting! When wedding planning becomes stressful, please know that you are not alone and there are a lot of people out there (including us and our 2015 couples ;) ) who are cheering you on and want your marriage to start off on the right track! Please let us know how we can help make the start of your marriage AMAZING! ;)

Wedding Reflections – Casey and Alex

Gratitude  //  1st February 2016

Casey and Alex were married on May 28, 2015 in the magical Castello Vincigliata just outside of Florence, Italy! Below are some of their reflections from the beginning of their married lives together!

1. When reflecting on your wedding, what is it that you remember most?

Casey: It is so hard to specify a single thing I remember most about our wedding day. The absolute best part of getting married was creating a little island of people we love inside a castle in Italy where we could eat and drink together all night. But when I close my eyes and think back to the actual minutes of the day, I can still smell the peonies from my bouquet and the lemon trees that lined the aisle at Castello Vincigliata. I remember sneaking up to the balcony with Alex and dancing as the sun set over the hills of Fiesole, and I remember being surprised at the love I could feel for a single moment while listening to Molly’s service.

Alex: I remember the way everyone seemed so happy. We had gathered our closest friends and family in a really beautiful place to celebrate with us, and it felt like the happiest and best party I have ever been to. I also remember vividly standing in the sunshine waiting for Casey to come down the aisle and feeling nervous (because everyone was looking at me) but also calm because I knew this was exactly what I wanted to do.

2. If you could plan your wedding again, would you do anything differently?

Casey: There are three things I would have done differently. 1) I would not have waited more than a year and a half after our engagement to get married. Because Alex didn’t graduate until May of 2015, there was no break in time where we could take the kind of honeymoon we hoped to take. It turns out that you fill the time (no matter how much you have) with planning, but in reality a person could plan a wedding in a few weeks. 2) I would have rented out our room block at only one hotel so everyone was together. 3) I would have given more thought to the getting ready side of things on the day of the wedding. Hire professionals so everyone can sit back, relax, and feel pampered, and surround yourself with your very best friends and family during those precious hours.

Alex: I would pay more attention to the music. Our DJ was not so good, and ultimately we had to commandeer the music controls from him. Turns out that you cannot just trust the DJ to get it right, so it is worth taking the time to lay out what you want in detail.

3. What, if anything, did you do before your wedding that helped prepare you most for life after saying “I Do.”

Casey: Alex and I made sure to travel together as much as we could while we were dating. During those travels, we often found ourselves in uncomfortable or high pressure situations, so figuring out how to deal with that as a team was good preparation for marriage. Those trips usually meant we didn’t have cell phones with us, so we filled in the time with the “big picture” conversations that helped us figure out if we were compatible for the long term.

Alex: We planned out a really long honeymoon, so after we said “I do” we spent 3 months just relaxing, exploring, and having a good time together. The months leading up to the wedding can be unnecessarily stressful, so creating something to balance that out was the best thing we could have done.

4. What is it that you LOVE most about being married that all of those engaged couples can look forward to?

Casey: It’s so funny looking back, because on some level I found the concept of marriage pretty terrifying. I was worried that I might lose some of my identity as a strong and independent woman, and the opposite happened; I actually feel stronger and more like myself now that Alex and I are in this partnership together, and I love that. Also, waking up next to your best friend every single day is just the best.

Alex: Everyday start and end the day with my best friend, which means that I start off every single day happy. It is pretty incredible.

5. What advice would you give to an engaged couple who is currently planning their own wedding?

Casey: The day goes by in an instant. You spend months and months planning this thing, and then BAM – you feel like you’ve entered a time warp because eight hours felt like one. The details are important to an extent, but just be prepared to not get to see most of them. Use that image in your head to hone in on the most important things – what the officiant will say, how you will carve out a little time for just the two of you, and how you want to spend your time leading up to the ceremony. We only had 40 guests at our wedding, and I barely got to talk to everyone. With that in mind, make sure you have a gathering either before or after where you can spend time catching up with people so you don’t feel obligated to do the rounds during your wedding day.

Alex: You should have what you really want in your wedding, not what your friends have and not what your family thinks you need. Also if you think outside the box, you don’t have to break the bank to have a killer party.

6. Is there anything else that you would like to share with other engaged/newly married couples?

Casey: The things people mention when we talk about our wedding were things that I thought were small details. They remember the cake and the handwritten thank you notes I put at each place and the guest book I made with info about each person there. Two out of three of those things were practically free, so the amount of money you spend really has nothing to do with the impact your wedding will have on you, your family, or your friends. When you start feeling like you really need to spend $2000 more for the chairs you think will look prettier, try to remember that no one else remembers the details. What your guests will remember is a happy and in love couple and the promise of a happy life together. The rest is just background.

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We are so excited to start this year off with a Wedding Reflections Series on our blog from our 2015 Liz and Ryan couples! We understand that wedding planning can be hard and overwhelming… but we hope you never forget that all that really matters is that you are getting MARRIED! ;) That is so exciting! When wedding planning becomes stressful, please know that you are not alone and there are a lot of people out there (including us and our 2015 couples ;) ) who are cheering you on and want your marriage to start off on the right track! Please let us know how we can help make the start of your marriage AMAZING! ;)

Wedding Reflections – Cathy and Jeff

Gratitude  //  25th January 2016

Cathy and Jeff were married at Hawk Valley Retreat in Galena, IL on May 16, 2015. Here are a few of their reflections from the beginning of their lives together as a married couple!

1. When reflecting on your wedding, what is it that you remember most?

Cathy:  I remember being overwhelmingly happy from the moment I saw Jeff at our first look through the end of the night!  It rained during our ceremony which made us move everything inside and I didn’t even care.  It’s a hilarious story and made for great memories.  My favorite photo of the day is when he and I were running through the rain to the tent to finish our ceremony.  Really, from the minute I saw him and got to hug him, nothing and no one else mattered.  I was just so happy to be marrying Jeff!

Jeff: Our quick discussion up front during the ceremony when I could feel the back of Cathy’s dress getting heavy with the rain, and we looked at each other and said… “Is it time… Yeah, It’s time!  And then we made the announcement to move into the tent and went running down the aisle!

2. If you could plan your wedding again, would you do anything differently?

Cathy:  I think I would have taken a little more time on my own in the morning.  It felt like such a whirlwind with people all around asking so many questions that I didn’t really get time to reflect on all the day would bring until I was at our first look location.  I wish I had a few quiet moments on my own to journal/reflect/enjoy all the day would bring.  

Jeff:  I really loved how our wedding went!  That being said, I agree with Cathy, that the day was a crazy whirlwind of people and tasks.  I would have loved to had more downtime and less things that I personally needed to accomplish.

3. What, if anything, did you do before your wedding that helped prepare you most for life after saying “I Do.”

Cathy:  Yikes-this is tough!  We should start by telling everyone reading that we have lived and worked together for several years before we were married so we had worked out a lot of kinks and butted our heads together in a lot of ways before our wedding day.  That said, marriage really is different even if you’ve lived together before.  We both have talked about how being married makes everything seem more important and more special because we know we’re in this together for the long haul.  I don’t think we really did anything formal to prepare for that, but we have worked really hard this year to make sure we make time for each other and enjoy the time we have together.  

Jeff:  Honestly, there was so much work to do before the wedding, and so much prep for our wedding season starting the weekend after the wedding, that I didn’t really have time to think about anything other than the wedding.  I feel like as much as you can prepare, most of life after I Do is just taking each day as it comes and trying to connect as much  as we possibly can through our crazy lives.

4. What is it that you LOVE most about being married that all of those engaged couples can look forward to?

Cathy:  Ummm…everything!  ;-)    Seriously though, it’s different now that I get to look at Jeff and say “that’s my husband!”  I love thinking of ways to help him when we’re crazy busy so that he doesn’t feel so overwhelmed.  I love getting to say I’m his wife and he’s my hubby.  I love that I have someone that I can support fully and who I know will support me fully.  

Jeff:  Something silly, but it is fantastic to be able to introduce my “Wife” to guests at weddings every weekend.  There is a sense of security though, knowing my wife is my partner in the business and that every decision we make is one we are making for the two of us!

5. What advice would you give to an engaged couple who is currently planning their own wedding?

Cathy:  There are quite a few things I would say, but first and foremost you have to remember that the wedding is just one day in the course of a lifetime you’ll be sharing together.  If everything isn’t perfect or people don’t notice little details you put into it, you can’t spend much time worrying about it.  The most important thing is that you and your fiancé end up married at the end of the day.  Everything else is just details.  And hire people that you really trust to do the work for your wedding!!!!  I can’t stress this enough!!!!  We hired people that we knew we could count on and it made all the difference in the world.  I didn’t have to worry because I knew I had people in place that would handle the things that mattered.  

Jeff:  Make it your own.  Don’t worry about what everyone else wants you to do.  Make sure you love everything you are planning to do for your wedding, otherwise you will just walk away with a list of things you wished you had done differently.

6. Is there anything else that you would like to share with other engaged/newly married couples?

Cathy:  Try to enjoy this planning process together.  Sometimes the guys act like they don’t care about many decisions, but it’s so nice to get his perspective on things when you can.  I’m lucky in that Jeff and I worked together to plan it all so it was our day through and through.  This is the very first big event you’re preparing for so do all you can to prepare for it together.  The more you do that the better off you’ll be down the road when life throws other things at you that you have to plan for together.  

Jeff: Exactly what Cathy said!  Plan it together.  The day is about the two of you, so there is no reason to only have the bride, or the groom plan the wedding on their own.  It is the start of a lifetime of planning things together!

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We are so excited to start this year off with a Wedding Reflections Series on our blog from our 2015 Liz and Ryan couples! We understand that wedding planning can be hard and overwhelming… but we hope you never forget that all that really matters is that you are getting MARRIED! ;) That is so exciting! When wedding planning becomes stressful, please know that you are not alone and there are a lot of people out there (including us and our 2015 couples ;) ) who are cheering you on and want your marriage to start off on the right track! Please let us know how we can help make the start of your marriage AMAZING! ;)